Is this what I’m going through at this very moment in time?

Christmas is past, New Year’s is coming, and we are in the stage where we ask ourselves, do we take down our decorations yet? I’m not… I love how the decorations bring joy, warmth, comfort, and excitement into the 4 walls of our home. The soft glow of lights when all the main lights are out, and the glimmer and shimmer of the tinsel and garland spread throughout the house. I will take it down after 2020 begins.. yes.. that is what I’ll do..

In the meantime, we are past the joyous Christmas cheer, and one of my little ones came down with not only 1 but 2 of the most dreaded sicknesses to date.. Strep AND the Flu… Poor Adam… he’s absolutely miserable, and he has 4 loose teeth that are bothering him.

It all started early Sunday morning, when he came into my bed, saying he was cold and needed to get warm. (awwww) He is my main cuddler nowadays. I quickly took his temp, and it was high.. 104.5.. We were going to Silver Dollar City this fine day, and we had 45 minutes til GO-TIME…. 😦 I asked Allie if she really wouldn’t mind staying home with him, so we could still go, and then called Papa to see if he would be willing to check on them throughout the day. Thankfully, he was willing and able. However, I did feel guilty for leaving and taking the other 2 kids to have a fun day. Allie didn’t really care to go though, so that helped with the guilty feelings.

We ended up getting home around 8, which is right about bedtime. I let Adam sleep with me that night, so I could monitor him. He was super warm and kept needing water and to blow his nose. poor kid.. So, this morning, we went to see the doctor, and they tested for both strep and flu.. He came back positive.. ugh.. I had to contact everyone who had been exposed to his illness the last couple of days. Thankfully, it was just us, and the grandparents.. and we will be isolated for the next few days.. No New Year’s party at our house this year. only us.. it’s ok though. We will still have a celebration, and will make if memorable.

Autumn was supposed to go to the roller skating rink for New Year’s, and attend an all night skate party. Well, she had some major behavior issues on both Friday and today at the RAC. Unfortunately, when given her chance to make what she did Friday, right today, she messed up again.. so, this is the consequence, and she knew it very clearly. Friday’s episode was due to her being super disrespectful with staff, and being a bully to other kids. I was called both Friday and today to pick her up. Today’s was about her hitting another kid 12 times and just refused to stop. It’s not tolerated behavior, at all. She is still able to return on Thursday this week, but oh my goodness. This child needs to learn..

I’m working from home today and tomorrow, so hopefully we can be on the mend with this flu stuff, and enjoy eachother for the remainder of Winter Break.

Bring on 2020…

Last night was a committee meeting for Austin’s Cub Scout Pack.

There was a Committee Chairperson, Unit Commissioner, C.O.R, and an Assistant District Commissioner present at this meeting. (these are the Benton County district leaders, so major wow factor here)..

I had no idea what we were in for, but I thought it was simply to discuss the plans for 2020, and get some organization in our program for the kids.

It was more like “hey, your leaders are no longer here, and we need you parents to get involved now, otherwise, the pack is going to be shut down.” WHAT???? I was in shock to hear this. I wasn’t surprised about the lack of organization that they mentioned, because I felt like this was quite chaotic all along. But, I thought maybe it was the norm? I had no idea how things were supposed to be, as I was joining this program for the first time.

Basically, we have to start from the ground up, we need to plug into committee meetings, round table meetings, increase communication, get organized, and fill chair positions.

I reviewed the list of positions, and I am considering taking the following, as we don’t have enough parents to cover them all.

Treasurer, Assistant Den Leader, Blue & Gold Chair, and Popcorn Kernel. I feel that I have great skills that will contribute well in these areas. I do believe that I have some talents and gifts, and we, as parents, are requested to help with things. I feel compelled to step in here and make a difference for the kids. They need excitement and fun in Cub Scouts. They shouldn’t dread coming, and they need adults they can count on being there. I am always there anyway, so why not plug in to this wonderful program that is going to teach basic life skills, respect, pride, leadership skills, communication, and values.

The friendships will be lifelong, the challenges rewarding, and it will raise my kid to be a leader.

You’re probably thinking I’m crazy, as I already have a a full plate, but honestly, this is an investment in my son, and he’s worth it! I will make the time. That’s what you do.. something will have to give, even if it’s me having to do an online training course rather than watching a Hallmark movie one evening. I’ll do whatever I can to make a positive difference in the life of my children.

That’s what moms do….

I believe in this program, and even though I know very little, what I do know, I am inspired by.. so.. here goes something big… 🙂

Sometimes my kids whine… and I am definitely minimalizing the word “sometimes….”

I fear that they are going to get this reputation of “whiners and complainers.” I have no idea where they got this little bad habit, but it’s driving me up the wall.

I might be a big part of who they are by spoiling them, being a push over, and easily forgetting punishments, and sometimes failing to stick to my guns. Kids quickly pick up on their parents shortcomings, and use to their advantage. I know this…

I can be making the most amazing breakfast you have ever seen, and one or more will complain about something not being their favorite, or it smells disgusting, or looks funny.

It can be a gorgeous day outside, and NONE of them will want to go outside with me. They are content being inside, but only if they can be on some sort of electronic device. But, even with that privilege, I will hear bickering between siblings, when they are playing a game together. Someone is doing something they don’t like in the game, and BAM! It’s a full on war and I’m just listening to this, shaking my head in frustration..

There can be a new movie out in the theater, and all but 1 will find interest in going to see it. Of course, all of them expect and want a treat at the movie theater too. and of course, I give in and do it. We are at the movies afterall, and it’s what you do, right?

What is out there, that will please all of my kids? I want to make them happy, but somewhere in life, they need to find happiness on their own. Find something they can be excited about, without being such negative nancy’s.

Even Adam’s karate instructor said that Adam is the most negative kid he’s ever come across. WOW! That just caught me off guard, because I hadn’t been observing that.. but, it’s so true among all of my kids, really.

I want them to be grateful, kind to each other, build each other up, be positive, take initiative when they see that someone needs help. I try to be these examples to them, but it’s like they are so into their own thoughts and wants, they don’t see beyond themselves in any situation.

I’m working on a resolution for this in the new decade coming up. 🙂 It’s going to be one of my many tasks for 2020 in regards to raising these little souls.

My goal for 2020 is to win over the whining and complaining, and constant negativity.

I am going to be sooo happy and positive in their faces, they’re going to wonder what happened to their serious mommy…

I do tend to live life seriously, and not take time to have F-U-N!

Adam did mention on the way to school this morning, that he wants to play hide and seek this weekend… We shall do just that!!

To new beginnings of happiness, gratefulness, thoughtfulness, and kindness in our home, and hopefully spread to all of those we may cross paths with in the coming decade!!

Cheers to winning over whining!!

The kids are absolutely counting down the days until Christmas. They see all the beautifully wrapped presents under the tree, and constantly ask me when they can open one. They even want to arrange them where all of their presents are grouped by name. I told them NO WAY! That takes the fun of searching for your special something under the tree.

I did my gift inventory earlier this week, and discovered that I am a few short for Adam. Allie is really raking in the gifts this year. I must stay neutral, and it’s hard to do that throughout the year, as you grab something that makes you think of that child. Typically, Allie is the most difficult to buy for, but this year was different.

So.. off to the store I go one last time, to make sure I have even number of gifts for all.

I did have the kids go gift shopping for one another, and I will have each one come up to my room, to wrap the gifts individually. That way, it truly is from them. I look forward to this Christmas, as it will be our first one in the new house, plus, I am hosting a little get together Christmas Eve. It should be a great day / night. We will decorate sugar cookies, play Christmas music, watch movies, make the house smell like Christmas, and hopefully we get some snowflakes? 🙂

I’m also planning a New Year’s Eve party for the kids, so that should be super fun! Just no ceiling fan to drop the confetti, as we have done every single year.. what can I do instead?? I’m still trying to figure that out!! It’s got to be epic.

We have a few more activities before the holidays arrive, so just trying to make it special for the kids, and my hope is that they will treasure this time in our lives. Just us…

It all started on Sunday. The kids and I were just hanging out, chilling, playing, watching Hallmark, sipping on some coffee, in the pj’s.. you know.. enjoying the weekend.

I had major plans for us this fine day.

We were going to declutter, organize, clean, and then the reward was a movie…

When I told them all this, I heard moaning and groaning.. oh the fun!I was in cleaning mode, so I got after it. I started in the boys’ room. I put on the Christmas music, and the boys were intrigued by what I was doing for about 5 seconds. Then, I heard them run upstairs to play with their legos. I was fine with this, as I just wanted to get this project done, as efficiently, discretely donating and throwing out things I know they don’t care about. I ended up with 4 trash bags, and 3 donate bags. Amazing!!

Once I finished their room, I moved onto Autumn’s area in the girls’ room. Oh boy!!! This girl loves her toys and considers every single thing to be a treasure. She holds everything dear to her heart, and cannot part with much. I had to recruit her help, as there was so much going on in there. Under the bed, under her desk, in hers and Allie’s closet, which Autumn dominated. So… after all was said and done in her area, we had 1 donate bag, and 2 trash bags. She somehow managed to find places for everything, and she was pretty proud of herself. I was too!

As for the reward.. they didn’t care until the end of the day. That’s when I heard the whining about not getting to go see Frozen 2.. oh my! too little too late my friends..

Anyway, I was now upstairs decorating the house with some additional Christmas stuff, when I heard the loud scream come from Austin. I tried to get the kids to tell me what happened, but that fell on deaf ears.. Austin just kept crying, and screaming in pain. My immediate thoughts when to Autumn. What had she done? Well.. it turns out, she had been chasing him with one of her birds, trying to get it to “poo” on him. He was running from her, and twisted his right ankle. I went down to inspect, and put ice on it. He was laid up the rest of the evening. I thought it was just a simple sprain, so put him to bed with the ice. In the morning though, he couldn’t put any weight on it. So, we went to the doctor, where they later determined that is a mild fracture. 😦

So…. now we have crutches and air stirrup until we get the appointment with the ortho…

should be a simple recovery time, no hindrance in his growth, or anything like that.

He’s in great spirits and loves having the crutches.. he really wanted a wheelchair.. go figure…

lol

Trying to stay calm during the storm is rather difficult.

Things can be only slightly bumpy, yet I react as if it were the most violent storm this earth has ever seen.

The kids are just being kids for the most part, but there are some very real behavior issues I’m being faced with.

Between video games, YouTube videos, certain school friends, and just simply feeding off of eachother, makes this whole parenting thing super challenging.

I love each and every one of my kids, and want them to be so many things.

I have compiled a list / ideas of ways to help boost the kids attitudes, behaviors, hearts and improve our bond together. Let’s hope these work.. or at least minimize these recent hurdles.

1. Taking them to buy gifts for each other. We plan on doing this tomorrow. Autumn and Allie will buy for each other, and the boys will buy for each other. The girls seem to have a very distant friendship, at best. This should be interesting on the gifts they choose for one another. I told them about this idea I had, in the car yesterday, and they seem to be pretty excited about being able to go shopping and spend some money for gifts. I’m quite pleased with this. This is our first time doing anything like this, so I have such anticipation of great things coming from this experience.
2. Christmas Parade – Austin is in it, so we are all going to be together, supporting this cub scout. He’s not excited about being in front of everyone, but we will be there, and the girls are encouraging him. So, hopefully all will go smoothly with that tonight. I will have some candy for him to throw to kids.. I might even give him a few extra pieces for his participation 🙂
3. Electronic Free day – Sunday will be electronic free day for ALL of us. I don’t have plans on what we will do yet, but maybe we will do some baking together, organizing our bedrooms, and donate some things we no longer need. Cleaning / getting organized is essential to help keep sanity, calmness, and feeling good and proud of your space. So, I want the kids to recognize these things in themselves, with their levels of accomplishment. We will see how far we get this weekend on that project.
4. Girls night out. We have our annual date night, just us girls. We will attend the Nutcracker Ballet Saturday night, with my mom and their cousin, Mckenna. It should be a great time. We always go out for hot chocolate and a cookie afterward, at the Walmart Cafe on the Bentonville Square. Such fun and delight. I always look forward to this night. I hope the girls enjoy the tradition as much as I do.
5. Hosting Christmas Dinner at our house. The kids were at their dad’s for Thanksgiving, so I hope to make up for their absence with me, during Christmas. We will have some delightful treats, a great meal, and the family will all come and visit at our house. I really enjoy the holidays, especially Christmas. We decorated together last Sunday, when they got back from their dad’s, and it was special. I let the boys put out the village, we all put up tree ornaments, and next up.. the wrapping of some presents to put under the tree early. They cannot wait to start seeing presents under the tree.
6. Advent Calendar – This is another tradition we have in our house. Each child gets their very own chocolate Advent Calendar, they look forward to these. It’s the main reason to get out of bed everyday in December, right?

With all these “little” things, I hope hearts become a little softer, voices a little gentler, hugs a little longer, kindness a little bigger, and friendships a little stronger.

The kids come back from their dad’s house, always saying they had a great time.

I know what their weekends entail, so I just roll with it. I know they have large amounts of screen time, some of it is unsupervised, as well as the choices of tv shows, are not always age appropriate. I have one child that fills me in on what they watched, even if they were told not to tell me. ugh…

I love my kids, I don’t want to hurt them, by talking negatively about their dad.

But, geez.. does he not understand that these are small children, and they are sponges? They take EVERYTHING in, and are very heavily influenced by what they are exposed to?

I am just in shock sometimes by the things..

But, here I am, trying to detox their minds from what they are exposed to over there.

Not trying to bash him… by any means..

It’s just that sometimes common sense isn’t so common.

I am all geared up for all things Christmas.. holly, jolly, and be merry. 🙂

spread that cheer and make the moments count. every.single.one.

Don’t let the downers get you down…

I am not giving up on keeping my kids as innocent as possible, as long as possible…

<)

Cheers…

Here we are. Thanksgiving is rapidly approaching, family plans are being made; kids are going to be with their dad for the holiday weekend.

They don’t have school all week, so they have been going to the Rogers Activity Center each day, and they are enjoying it pretty well. I haven’t received any reports of behavior issues!! I take that as a huge WIN for this week.

We went to dinner at Corona restaurant out by our house last night. They are closing after Thanksgiving, and my oldest daughter is so bummed. So, we had to get one final meal from them, per her request.

We have so much to be thankful for this season, and I really want to enjoy this down time I’m about to have, as I don’t get much at all.

These next 4 days will be spent with family, getting that quality time that is much needed, but also some personal time.

I really do enjoy being alone, and some people might find that to be strange, but I don’t.

Without that personal, private time, I would most likely become a co-dependent person, and that is not a healthy way to live. I love being independent.

I am enjoying the freedom, flexibility, to just do what I want on a whim.

As for what I’m thankful for: My children; watching them grow, developing their individual personalities, interests, sense of humors, and discovering what they need from me, as their mom.

I am going to miss them this Thanksgiving, the first one in our new home. But, they will have Christmas here, and we will decorate together, make and decorate cookies, and do all the festive things together.

Holidays are my favorite time of year, and it fills my heart with joy, just all the things of the season.

I wanted to participate in the annual lighting of the Fayetteville Square, by attending the actual lighting ceremony.

I left work early on Friday, picked up the kids, they were NOT at all excited about this.

It was drizzling, traffic was heavy, and I just knew we were pushing our time on being there early.

Sure enough, traffic was slow moving, and any delay that could possibly happen for us, did…

We ended up finding parking, but had to walk 3 blocks up the hill to the square. On our way up the hill, the lights were turned on, and we missed it.. by the time we got to the top, the parade was just about to start, people were gathered, it was great to me. But, all I could hear was whining from all 4 of my lovely children.

They didn’t want to be there. They didn’t have the Christmas spirit, they were completely miserable. Allie was hungry, but the other 3 just wanted to go home.

I was about to cry at this moment, because it was something I wanted for us all to enjoy, take in the magic of the lights, the season, the togetherness of our community. The experience. It was so frustrating, but I didn’t let them get to me.

Instead, I said, let’s go get dinner at DamGoode Pies, and then we will come back to the square, get hot chocolate, walk around for a minute, get a family photo, then we will go home.

It worked out well, with minimal whining from then on.

I DID manage to get our family photo with smiles.. YES!

I call it a win, but with a little feeling of defeat, knowing they didn’t share the excitement, joy and happiness that I felt, and wanted to badly for them to have.

I’m all about traditions, memories, and holiday cheer.

I’m determined that we will be a cheerful family, and they will appreciate the simple things that life does bring.

What does it take to teach your children about trust?

I have two little boys that want my trust, but they betray it time and time again.

I busted them last night in their bedroom, with candy AND their electronics in their beds..

I had already tucked them nicely into their beds, but, with the recent issues, I am checking on them every 5 minutes, until I KNOW they are asleep.

There is a need for a deep talk about trust, and what it means.

They are grounded until they go to their dad’s on Wednesday this week.

Austin has been issued the “grounding” until mid-January, but he can earn small blocks of time back, with doing some positive things. I though the punishment was a little much, considering he thrives on being able to play his games, and such. I want to reward good behavior, but here we are, once again, with the immediate abuse of the privilege.

This mom is about to show these boys what it means to EARN the electronic time, and EARN the trust.