My firecracker of a girl, Autumn, is now at camp for a week. I dropped her off at the bus yesterday afternoon. It was a rainy day, but she was in good spirits, and excited to start her adventure. She even ran into one of her old camp counselors from last year. Autumn truly does not know a stranger. She likes to ride the bus to the camp because she says it gives her the opportunity to meet people and make a new friend before she even gets to camp. I just love her precious personality and care for those around her.

Now, if only she was that way all the time. 24 hours prior to this moment, I was so upset with her behaviors and could not WAIT for her to go to camp for a week. This girl drives me batty! lol She had been picking on Allie, who had just gotten back from her trip overseas. Autumn said I am so glad you’re back, so now I can pester you.. sigh.. that is not how you get on your big sister’s good side.. Then, there was the throwing of toys across the living room, destroying her brother’s lego town, arguing just to argue, and on and on..

The boys are getting along so great, and playing lego town in the living room, watching a movie, playing outside, no real arguments.

Allie is off in her room, keeping to herself, but I make sure to go in there, and check to see that she’s still alive. haha.. she comes out to eat, and hang out briefly, I make sure to ask her a bunch of questions, just to get her engaged. she’s at this teenage age, where she just wants to listen to music, read, and she loves plays and musicals. I took her on a date Saturday night to see Les Miserables. We ate dinner at a burger place next door, and it was pretty good. Allie loves a good burger, and of course, we had dessert. She ordered the cookie skillet with ice cream on it. oh my!! so yummy.

We still have my dad’s convertible, so I plan on taking the boys for little rides if I have to run errands this week. They love it!! simple things bring them pleasure, but they have such a love for cars.. especially their papa’s new Tesla.

It’s only Monday, and we have all week without Autumn. She made sure to ask if we were planning anything fun while she was gone. If she was going to miss out on fun.. I told her Adam has karate belt testing Tuesday, Allie’s birthday party at Climb in Bentonville on Thursday, and she is ok being gone for those 2 things, because she doesn’t want to try the rock climbing. But, she will be back in time to attend Kylee’s birthday party at the roller rink on Sunday.. so, yay!

I think it’s going to be a pretty calm week without our little firecracker in town.. haha

Today’s title reflects exactly how my life has been the last week or so..

I don’t really know where to start, but I know what I’m going to share might make you cringe.

Frustrating things have been happening, and I just don’t know how to maintain my sanity lately. The kids overall, are OK, but there are some buttons they push that drive me over the edge.

Autumn for instance.. full of mouthy sass.. in fact, overflowing with it so much. She goes to Camp War Eagle on Sunday, and I’m actually looking forward to her being gone for a week. She is the main instigator of picking on others, and causes so much stress with me particularly. She just doesn’t know when to stop. I try to bite my tongue, but my immediate instinct, is to be sarcastic right back at her. She can dish it out, she should be able to take it. But, I know that’s not the correct way to handle the situation with a 10 year old. I just can’t seem to control my tongue either. So, there you go.. we are both guilty, and I’m the adult, so I need to do better. I get so angry so fast. It’s very very hard to control.

Then, with the fighting and the back talk, there’s Adam. They went to their dad’s last weekend for Father’s Day, and he had multiple accidents in his pants with #2. He went through all of his undies, as well as Austin’s. I believe their dad threw out the undies, because when they came home, there were only 2 pairs remaining in the suitcases.. hmmm. So, we survived the week on 4 or 5 pairs in the house, while doing laundry. I finally went to the store tonight to stock up, because ALL week long, Adam has continued the soiling of the pants. I do not know what is causing this!!!! He says he can’t help it, it’s just coming out.. there’s no stomach bug, there’s no constipation, there’s no change in our routine.. so, not sure what this is. I was so frustrated this evening though, because he had soiled his bathing suit, and we weren’t going home until after Allie arrived back from her trip late tonight. But, we went to Walmart earlier in the evening, thank goodness! I had one pair of the new undies stuffed in my purse, and we cleaned him up in the airport bathroom, while we waited on Allie to arrive. But, OMG! Talk about a mess. I am trying my best to be patient and understand they reason for this new set back.

Then, there is this…. Autumn told me that the last visit they had at their dad’s, she saw smoke coming from a vape (or something like that) in the kitchen where her dad was. She confronted him about it, and he brushed her off , and told her to go back to playing a video game. This tore her up for the next few weeks, until they went to see him again this past weekend. She brought it up to him again, because she had been thinking about it constantly, and wanted to know more about this. She asked him again. He said that it wasn’t him, it was his girlfriend who was vaping.. she still doesn’t know if that’s 100% truth, but she’s feeling better about the story. I don’t know what the truth is, but I hated seeing her hurt so much. She said she doesn’t want her daddy to end up dying because he was smoking. He should know better.

I have to say there is one good thing going on here. My dad let me borrow his 2 seater convertible (Chrysler Crossfire) for a week or two. I have taken each kid in a little ride on the street with the top down. They loved that! I have taken one or two on quick errands down the road, and they are so excited to get to ride in it. I am going to make sure I take each one on a special date before we have to return it to him. It’s a fun little car.

And the latest development, is that Allie is home now. We have missed her! She apparently had a good time, but she was very quiet, and did end up lost once. She also didn’t end up bathing ??? not sure what’s up with that, but OMG! It was 90 + degrees over there, and they were outside for most of their days. I just cannot understand that.. I could definitely smell her when we hugged. I told her, without being like totally disgusted, that she would need to take a shower tonight. She did not argue with me. Thank goodness!!! She says she had a good time, but doesn’t know if she would do it again. She was a bit uncomfortable. I think it might be the fact that she was constantly around people, not real down time for yourself, and full days. She’s not used to all that activity. It was good for her to experience this type of trip, and I’m glad she had the opportunity.

I will mention Austin, since I updated on the other 3. He has been doing great, no real issues to speak of, except, he likes to take his time, and lolligag with tasks. I have a hard time being patient with that.. his response to my requests, is “wait just a minute” and I do not respond well to that… Other than that, he is liking his fan on “5” at night, and has to have a night light on. He’s very much into me reading the stories to them at night. He claims he can’t sleep unless I read a chapter every single night.

Ciao for now…

I was looking at our calendar, and oh my goodness, are we booked solid!!

It’s going to fly by, and before we know it, we will be back to the daily grind of school, homework, and everything else that goes with it.

The month of June includes:

Karate & Pizza night tonight, flying to take the kids to their dad’s tomorrow evening, karate next week, pick up Allie next Thursday night, a play with Allie next Saturday night, Autumn goes to Camp War Eagle, Adam will have karate belt testing, we will have Allie’s birthday party at Climb Bentonville, and some birthday parties for friends in between there.

The month of July includes:

Allie goes to San Antonio with the Duke Tip program for 3 weeks, Austin has 2 weeks of swimming lessons, we take a trip to Nashville, dentist appointments, a family reunion locally, pick up Allie from TX, and then they go visit their dad again.

The month of August includes:

My 40th birthday party in Tulsa with friends for 1 night, a California trip to see our Oma with Gramma, kids and me. We return the day before school starts!! Allie and I go to a play in Tulsa (Hamilton). And more dentist appointments.

Fun times ahead, with no dull moments here…

Allie is off on her adventure to Greece & Italy for 10 days. My dad and I dropped her off at the airport this morning, and she was excited and ready for the fun ahead. She might be super quiet, but that girl has some cleverness about her, and this adventure side, that I did not have at her age. We just planned her 14th birthday party, and she wants to have her party at Climb in Bentonville. (wall climbing) WOW! OK we will do that. I booked it last night, and she’s excited about that too. She leaves for San Antonio in July for 3 weeks with the Duke Tip program. Fun summer for her, but educational in a big way. I’m very proud of that desires she has, and how much she loves learning.

Autumn, Austin & Adam started their summer fun with the Rogers Activity Center yesterday. So far, I’ve only heard good things from them, so hopefully that continues. I told one of the counselors as I picked up my kids, that she will definitely know me by the end of this summer. She had asked for my ID 3 times, short attention span, I guess.. but, she won’t need that for long.. haha (hopefully my kids are well behaved in this environment…) fingers crossed!

We did have a lovely hike over the weekend at White Rock Mountain, south of Fayetteville. The beauty was breathtaking. AND the kids didn’t complain once. wow! I definitely call that a win! They had such a great time. I love that and it makes my heart so very happy.

Father’s Day weekend is coming up, and the plan is for the kids to go to their dad’s on Thursday evening, and stay for 3 nights, instead of just 2. hopefully that works out…

We have had the most productive school year to date. This has been a challenging one, but an excellent year for growth, and understanding.

I feel like we have all experienced some ups and downs, but we are managing better with each other.

It helps when there are some positive influences that come into our lives, providing support, a little guidance, and encouragement. Without those things, we probably wouldn’t be feeling this way.

The last day of school was today. Autumn met her AR goal, so her reward that she negotiated with her teacher, was to bring her birds for a quick show and tell. She absolutely LOVED that! She struggled all year with meeting her AR goals each quarter, but towards the end, her teacher had her staying after school a couple days each week, to make sure she would meet it. AND She did!!

Austin also met his AR goal last week, so that was an amazing Win!! He was struggling toward the end, so it was awesome when his teacher messaged me a picture with his big smile. I’m sure that felt like a huge accomplishment for him.

Adam’s teacher said he has improved tremendously over the course of the school year with his behaviors, and he really is organized, and does his homework in a timely manner. I just hope these wonderful habits stick. He’s a good kid, and I love how he makes sure I sign his homework every night. He also enjoys having a “home” lunch every day. He gets kind of sad when I tell him there wasn’t time to make one..

Allie leaves for Italy & Greece on Tuesday next week. Her first international trip, and without me!! We are throwing a special goodbye party for her on Sunday evening, complete with Greek & Italian foods..

Off to the Rogers Activity Center for the summer for the 3 younger kids, and they always have fun activities planned, so I love it! The cost is $$$$, but the fun they have, the environment, and the staff is excellent, so I feel very comfortable sending my kids there. Since I have to work, it’s great knowing that they are having a fun-filled summer.

We are planning on going on a hike tomorrow, so hope the kids enjoy that.. We all know how that goes.. hahahaha

When there is fun, there is usually a good time that comes with it.

We did so many fun things this weekend, but it’s definitely not in order.. just putting it out there, as it flows… bear with me. ha

To my kids, when you mention the word “hike” it’s soooo exhausting. They tell me that it’s hard work to go on a hike. They immediately act like they’re starving the second they get into the car, and once we’re there, they are tired, and their legs hurt. It is all I can do to say “look at the beauty around you, and let’s enjoy the day.” It’s work.. I really do enjoy the outdoors, and hope that it will spark interest in the kids at some point in their life with me. So far, it’s not their favorite activity, by any means.

So.. as you can probably guess, that is one of the many activities that were included in our holiday weekend. We went to Ponca, AR and explored Lost Valley Hiking Trail and went to Eden Falls. It was the perfect weather, the rich green of the forest, just filled my soul, and made it the most amazing experience for me. They DID end up having fun, because they got to splash and play in the water at the falls, and the small section of the river that didn’t have a major current. It was mostly smooth, shallow and clear. just a perfect place for them to play and use their imagination. Austin & Adam even built a rock wall. (they did call it Trump’s wall… oh boy.. lol)

Saturday night went to dinner and a movie in Papa’s limo one night, and saw the kids’ requested movie, “Detective Pikachoo” (not sure on the spelling). Not my favorite movie, but it wasn’t about me.. it was about the kids having an awesome night out on the town with us. I would say that it was mostly a success. Except.. Austin said he didn’t have a good time because there was no popcorn or snacks.. I explained that we had just finished eating dinner at a restaurant, and we don’t always get snacks at movies… ugh.. He still wasn’t satisfied with that answer. oh well..

Friday evening, we celebrated my nephew’s High School Graduation, and went swimming and had a cookout with family and friends at my dad’s new indoor pool house. It was a great time.

Saturday afternoon, my cousin, Gina, also celebrated her 1 year anniversary of being open as “Reverie Coffee & Teahouse.” So, of course, we had to celebrate and be part of the festivities. Pure Joy Ice Cream samples, coffee, and treats. AND a cellist was featured entertainment. It was just so nice. Weather was amazing for that also. I took the kids in stages, so it wasn’t crazy. Food trucks were out there too, selling sno cones, so yeah.. we did that too. Gasp!!

Monday, we went to the Rogers Aquatic Center, because I had Buy 1 Get 1 Free passes, so why not? It was a great day! The kids LOVED the lazy river and enjoyed that for hours.. we ate lunch there, enjoyed a little ice cream treat, and swam some more. THEN, we went to Wal-Mart to get floating tubes, so they could use them at Papa’s indoor pool. AND, we went swimming over there too, before it was too late. We also went to a fairly new place called “Smudgies” in Springdale, to try their amazing looking treats. Why not??

To end our fun filled weekend, we invited Papa over for a cookout dinner, and lit the tiki torches on the back deck, and enjoyed our lovely meal outdoors.

Then, it was shower time, story time, and bedtime, for we had much to do the next day.. work and school.

This week has been pretty decent, considering what we’ve been through in past weeks.. 🙂

The holiday weekend is coming upon us, and the kids were supposed to be going to visit their dad. Well, as it turns out, they won’t be going afterall. They were looking forward to going, but they are taking it pretty well.

The funny thing is, they missed the ice cream truck on our street last weekend, so they immediately said, oh then we will be here for the ice cream truck this time!!! YES!!! It made me feel better, because they are doing ok. I know they’re a little bummed by this change, but I’m glad they have positive outlooks.

We have some great plans for this holiday weekend, so I’m looking forward to our quality time we will have.

The gym will be closed on Monday, so we will truly have a 3 day weekend doing lots of things, making those memories.

Don’t get me wrong, there will be some of those moments, where I will want to pull my hair out.. haha

Pee on the floor, next to the toilet, some kid won’t flush, and another kid will tell on the other for it. Someone will sneak food and put the trash under the couch. Someone else will hide their undies, if they don’t wipe well enough.. I’ll find them in a week. ugh!

With some of the plans I have, I’m sure 1 or more will whine about them. But, I only have good intentions here. My hope is that they will grow up, look back one day, and say, wow! We sure did a lot, and I am so glad we did!!

I do take a ton of pictures of everything we do, and at the end of each year, for Christmas, I put together an actual photo album from all the things we had done. I started this in 2015, and it will continue through their childhood, every year. They know I do this, so I now have requests to take a certain picture of something, and add it to the memory book.

THAT makes my heart melt, and KNOW that I’m doing at least SOMETHING right…

Happy Memorial Day weekend!!

Get outside, make some memories, try something new, and don’t forget to capture some of the moments on camera. 🙂

When you think you have all of “THIS” on your plate, and you don’t know how you’re going to get it all done, it’s time to “STOP” for a minute..

I am extremely guilty of just getting all caught up in all the “to do’s” and I stress out to the max, and then I cannot even focus on one of the tasks. I am overwhelmed almost instantly. That happened this week.. It doesn’t happen all the time, but when it does, watch out!

The kids were fighting, whining, getting in trouble, the demands of mom were there in full force, it was a karate night, homework was needing to be done, (one was telling me they had a homework pass from their teacher, but didn’t have it with them, to prove it) dinner was a battle, an iphone was lost, someone wanted to quit karate, someone didn’t feel good, someone else wasn’t listening to me, or following directions, and challenging me. Then, there was grocery pick up at the end of it all, and they closed at 8pm.. I got there at 8:10pm. Had to go inside the store, and then their hand held devices weren’t working, so they took 20 minutes to find one and get everything sorted out. It was past the kids bedtime, and oh my goodness. This mom just lost it.

It was all I could do to stay calm once we got home, and had to unload groceries, back packs, get pj’s on, brush teeth, and everyone needed to do as I said NOW.. (some kids just don’t want to do what they need to do)

Sigh.. I couldn’t stay calm.. I tried.. But, I lost it..

The “busyness” got me that night.

I don’t like being a yelling mom, but omg.. it happens more often than I would like to admit.

Here’s to trying to do better…

This past weekend, I had arranged for a babysitter for Saturday night, and then again on Sunday for the half the day.

The kids enjoy the babysitter they have. She’s out of high school now, she’s extended family, really. Her mother, is my step-sister’s 2nd cousin.. grasp that.. lol

Anyway, she and her boyfriend come to watch the kids, and they are really great with them. I know that Austin played baseball outside, and had a blast. I had requested that they set a timer for 1 hour of video games, and then 30-45 mins outside, and keep switching like that. Seemed to work successfully. The kids responded well, and everyone was having a great time.

I always feel guilty when I have a sitter, because this is quality time that I should be having with the kids myself. But, I also know that as a mom, you have to have a little time for R&R. So, I did just that. Friday night, I went to a friend’s house with my cousin, and the 3 of us cooked Indian cuisine.. it was so spicy and hot, OMG! But, it was a lovely meal, that we made. We enjoyed the sunset and watched a movie. nice evening, and very relaxing.

Sunday, I had the babysitter come back mid-morning, so I could take Allie (my oldest) to a special event for aspiring writers. Since she is in the process of writing her first novel, I wanted to expose her to some local authors, who have had success in publishing, they shared their experiences, and gave some great tips. The event was held in Eureka Springs at the Crescent Hotel. We ate lunch upstairs in the pizza place, because Allie LOVES pizza.. 🙂 It was perfect day for this event, as it was outside. Weather was just marvelous. Allie didn’t have much to say, but I sure hope she got something out of it. She just shrugged her shoulders when I asked her.. but, I’m sure there is something of value from this. She’s a quiet one for sure!!! One of the authors told me that most writers are introverts, so no need to worry. It’s sometimes difficult to express what the books are about that they’re writing, and to even summarize in one sentence what you want your audience to capture from their writing. Allie did have some trouble explaining what her book is about. But, she did say “it’s a fantasy book.” I have yet to read one page… the author did mention that she thinks it’s very important to share your work, and I found out that Allie is sharing her works online with a group. pretty exciting!

When we left the event, we headed straight home.. I was tired after that, but still managed to fold clothes, make smoothies, and play baseball with Austin outside. (his new found interest).

The kids ran to my room after a bit, when I was laying down for like 5 minutes.. they were telling me that the ice cream truck was on our street, and I needed to come quick! I didn’t have any cash, so Autumn grabbed $3 and they all went outside to chase after the truck. lol (they never caught him, but they’re looking forward to his return on our street next weekend)….

All in all, it was a great weekend, and now we’ll see what’s in store for our week…

We’re finally at Thursday, one day away from the discussed “reward” of the movies tomorrow night.

Unfortunately, we won’t be going, because 3 of the 4 kids made some poor choices in behaviors this week. (Allie didn’t do anything, but she also wasn’t interested in seeing this movie, Detective Peekachoo).

Autumn made a few poor choices with her behaviors throughout the entire week, so she was out by Tuesday. (sending a rude and inappropriate text to her brother’s friend, disrespecting me, and not listening or obeying at the playground last night, and saying curse words with Austin in the car, which Allie told me about.)

Austin was also saying some curse words in the car with Autumn, when I was inside the karate class, watching Adam last night. So, he was out. At least he made it to Thursday evening.. 🙂

Adam decided to not participate in karate class last night, so he ruined his chances to watch a movie with that choice. He also made it to Thursday evening. 🙂

So… on the way to school this morning, I had told them, let’s start over.. if we can have a good week, starting now, here’s the deal.

We can go out to dinner AND a movie, in papa’s limousine, the next free weekend we have together. They seemed to be excited about that!! So, let’s see if that motivates, shall we?

This week has been pretty hectic, getting back into the daily grind of school, homework, a choir performance, karate, field trips, sack lunches, bedtime stories, and all before 8:30… whew!

The weekend is coming, and we are ready!!!